Typically when we get together with friends and family we spend at least 80 percent of our emotional energy talking about our past. What happened at the job or with our friends? Who’s dating or divorcing who or who we ran into? Why we didn’t get a raise, and even how have the kids been doing in school? Family and social gatherings are everyone’s missed opportunity to cement your intentions and co-create your future. It’s no wonder for many of us our lives are spent stuck on a hamster wheel going nowhere fast. What’s worst is that for years so many of us have made it a habit to spend a great deal of time reflecting when we could be planning the future. We surround ourselves with negative and pessimistic people who become your dream snatchers and ridicule, shame, and even bully us into hiding or to stop daydreaming and to grow up.
Getting together with family or close friends is the most opportune time to co-create, to talk about our hopes, dreams and desire. To see how as a unit we can help each other succeed. Just think of the creative minds within your family, the family member who loves attention might just be the right fit to be your business spokes person, or the recent college graduate nephew might be great with numbers and is willing to spending a few hours a week looking over your accounting books. At events sponsored by your employer you might find out that your colleagues husband likes to tinker with small engines, or the bosses daughter has her CPR certificate and loves to babysit. Families and businesses that grow most often have one or two individuals that tune into these gems and find ways to foster their growth. Always remain vigilant of people who are looking to capitalize with their own self interest in mind.
There are cultures that ritualize the practice of getting together for the good of the the community especially indigenous tribes and families that follow strict religious beliefs. Despite the fact many of these folks live simple lives they are in truth limited to what their minds are exposed to and in today’s society and global communication the sky is no longer the limit on your potential. So dream on.
Family dinners, picnics, work socials and, reunions are events that can heighten your feel good emotions. Excitement is on emotional state that will motivate us to do tremendous things in our lives so why not capitalize on this emotional state in social gatherings. Imagine how different your life would be if you were more deliberate at talking about creating your future instead of just going with the flow.
The next gathering you get involved in come up with some talking points ahead of time that can expand your mind, promote synergy and personal growth. Share your ideas with the host and be sure to get the their permission or inform the folks attending of what you have in mind so that they are not caught off guard and are willing and prepared to contribute to the growth and prosperity of every one; even the ex-boyfriend that showed up unannounced. Your deliberate actions are not limited to getting the attention of the entire room. It could be having small conversations with one or two individuals. Either way plan a few no TV night, or just gather around after the big sporting event and create synergy that can catapult not just your life but everyone around you.
My next family gathering is my sons graduation and I plan on keeping things positive and encouraging. A robust discussion to include not only my sons future but how we can positively impact each other and support our individual dreams. We just might find some overlap. And not to worry, my brother, the family jester will get to chime in every now and then to keep our endorphins at a high. Don’t let missed opportunities be an accepted habit in your life.